Jo Ann Alo

writer – rhymer – Jesus junky

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When was the last time you were jealous?
     I know when a woman has eyes for my husband. And what I feel inside isn’t pretty. Fire shoots out every pour and eyes bulge like fists for a fight. I stand for my man. Dare you to bat those eyes even one more time. No one could ever love him the way I do. Ever fight for him the way I would.
     In high school he broke up with me to date someone else. I wasn’t jealous. If he was no longer interested, well, so long loser.                                              
     Rumors started circling that I was combing the halls looking to beat her up. So I found her. Told her, “Go for it. I got no problem with you.” If he wants to date someone else. Later. 
     That flips when someone is after my boyfriend. You think you can compete with me for his attention? Puh, right.
     Once we walk down the aisle this all gets legit. We’ve now got grueling hours invested in this gig. Again, if he wants out, don’t let the door hitcha. But stepin out in front of me and mine will cost ya. I will stab with eyes, snarl with spit, and bump with chest. 
     Reading Exodus, I had forgotten how God names himself, Jealous. It’s in chapter 34. Take a look. It’s awesome. I got to wondering about that. A ton of scriptures backing that up started rattling off in my mind. Felt so wanted, shielded, fought for.  
     No one wants us more than the LORD. 
     But if we don’t want him, He appeases us. Not in a snarky, could-care-less way, but a grieving way. Like loosing a most beloved. 
     If we exchange rings with God, join hands, hearts, and spirits with Him, things get hairy. If you want out ~ forget it. He’s not budging. Yeah, he’ll let out rope, but he won’t let go. 
     For the last year, my eyes have been lingering on darkness. Ya know, like overly occupied with bad news. Attentive to what is going wrong ~ ignoring all that’s moving really well. Darkness keeps dancing right in front of me. But lately, slits of light are penetrating through. 
     God’s jealous. 
     He wants these eyes zeroed in on Light. Enraptured in Us. Taken by his goodness all around. Breathless from the heat of his hand on my spirit. Smitten with the beauty of his creation, provision, and presence. As if to say, Look into My eyes. No one could ever love you the way I do. No one could ever fight for you the way I have ~ will ~ am. 
     Later, darkness. You can’t compete with that.    

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